Vulnerable
by Freelancer Xania
Summary: Just read Spirit Bound, and I had to put somethiing out there! So much to my dismay, the pairing is going to be Adrian/Rose mostly a night sometime while she's still in her cell, but there will be Dimitri/Rose in it too!
1. Just An Author Note

**As I write this, I am crying, and sobbing, and dieing inside. I JUST finished Spirit Bound, and the guy on the cover IS Adrian Ivashkov. For those of you who are Dimitri fans, wait it out [I so wish I did =_=''] That's all I'm saying for now. And, *sigh* Adrian isn't that bad for Rose. Such a shame though, Dimitri, such a smart guy, so many idiotic excuses he comes up with! Well, I guess I've ruined my keyboard with enough tears. If anyone has finished reading the book, message me, I really need someone to talk to about the current situation in the book.**

**Brokenly yours,**

**Angel Xandra Hunter**

**May 18th, 2010. **


	2. Maybe It's Just Me

**Woo. So I finally got around to writing this. After much editing, and taking stuff out and what-not [I'm not very good with fluffy stuff.] I finally decided this was okay. Haha, don't hate me if it's too terrible. Well anyway. I've been extremely busy. Dancing for a 15's party. Writing songs. Reading books. And much more. Um, the next part to this willcome out soon, but for now, enjoy.**

* * *

Rose

The jail cell was enough to drive anyone crazy. Especially me. The lack of anything. It feels dead. The walls trap you in, the bars give you the sensation of being worthless, expendable, a criminal, an animal. I was loosing hope. No one could visit me. I made sure of that. If I was going to break down, I would do it with no one to watch. To see pity, from the people I care about most, would be unbearable. So I told them I didn't want to see any of my friends. Or family. Or anyone for that matter.

I was in complete agony. The cell was so dreadful, and _empty,_ I realize now why _he_ refused to see me. Well besides the obvious reason of not caring for me. The only people I ever saw, were Adrian, and whom ever Lissa saw. Except for _him._ I avoided _him_ at all costs. Aways.

"Hathaway, time for dinner." The guardian that watched over me said loudly. His name was Andrew.

I turned to him with a grateful look. The food wasn't amazing, they kept me weak on purpose, but it was food. "Thanks, Andrew." I grabbed the plate. They served me mashed potatoes, and a chicken breast. The best thing I had gotten since I got there. I sat, and ate in silence.

"Eh, Rose?" Andrew asked wearily. Looking through the bars with an expression that said he was truely curious.

I looked up, and tried to raise an eyebrow, but failed terribly. "Yeah?"

"Ah, I don't know how to say this, but . . . I believe you. If whoever did this hadn't framed you, you would have made a great guardian. Just don't give up, Rose. I know it seems bleak, but you may get through this. Oh, um . . . and," he mumbled the rest incoherently.

My eyes widened, and both eye brows shot up to my hairline. "What?" I asked sharply.

"Guardian Belikov wants to come by." He mumbled again. Looking down, avoiding my gaze. He picked at invisible lint on his shirt.

I stared at him before saying in a deadly calm voice, "Don't you dare let him in." He simply looked away again, a sheepish expression planting itself on his face.

I shot up, the dinner completely forgotten. "No! He will _not_ come in! I refuse to speak with him!" I shouted angrily. He looked at the bars, possibly hoping they would stay in place.

"Rose . . . why don't you want to see him?" He asked, running his hands across his face tiredly.

"Because, I don't need my- I don't need _him_ telling me that I did something wrong." I said with a strong voice.

"Oh." Was all he said before I turned my back on him, and went to the bunk. I took the bracelet out of my pocket, and put it on. I didn't want to see anyone.

* * *

I woke up sweating, and sobbing. I had a dream about him. Again. He told me about how he didn't love me, over, and over again.

So I did what I always did when this happened, I sang myself to sleep. A song I discovered not too long ago, A song I enjoyed greatly in times like this.

_Didn't you wanna hear  
the sound of all the places we could go?  
Do you fear  
the expressions on the faces we don't know?  
It's a cold, hard road when you wake up,  
and I don't think that I have the strength  
to let you go.  
_

It was true I loved him with all my heart. I couldn't give him up. Not for the world. Dimitri was my heart, and soul. Before he shattered it. I heard a sound behind me. Where the guardian that did night shifts was, but I didn't move, didn't stop the soothing words that expressed my feelings so simply.

_Maybe it's just me.  
Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did  
wasn't just deceiving?  
And the tear in your eye,  
and your calm, hard face  
makes me wish that I was never brought into this place.  
_

I felt as if I was the only one that still had feelings now. he just didn't care about me and that hurt. Oh it hurt. I knew what he thought. That I did kill the queen, that I was just an obstacle. His face, his calm hard face, his cold eyes. I knew it was the truth when he told me he didn't care. I knew.

_There goes my ring,  
it might as well have been shattered.  
And I'm here to sing  
about the things that mattered.  
About the things that made us feel alive for oh so long.  
About the things that kept you on my side when I was wrong.  
_

I lived for the days, when all I had to worry about was meeting him at practice. When all I needed to do was keep it a secret. All I had to do was love him.

_Maybe it's just me.  
Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did  
wasn't just deceiving?  
And the tear in your eye,  
and your calm, hard face  
makes me wish that I was never brought into this place.  
_

And I wish we never met. Never fell in love. I wish I was never brought into this place. This place of heart break, and deception. Because it hurt. It hurt too much. And it would always stay there. The pain, the heart break. His words carved into my mind, leaving behind wounds that would be drowned in salt with just the memory of him.

_And someday, I promise I'll be gone.  
And someday, I might even sing this song to you.  
I might even sing this song to you.  
To you, to you, to you...  
And I was crying alone tonight,  
and I was wasting all of my life  
just thinking of you.  
So just come back,  
we'll make it better.  
So just come back,  
I'll make it better than it ever was.  
I'll make it better than it ever was.  
_

I would be gone, someday. Away from him. I would sing this song. Shout it to him, show him everything. Every tear filled night that I spent alone. The time I spent wasted thinking of happier times. The times I would sit, and wish he could come back, and make it better. Better than it ever was.

_Maybe it's just me.  
Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did  
wasn't just deceiving?  
And the tear in your eye,  
and your calm, hard face  
makes me wish that I was never brought into this place.  
_

By now the person was sitting up, with all the shifting i could tell. I was still singing. Singing through my tears. Singing through my hart break. giving the world a sneak preview into the emotions of Rosemarie Hathaway.

_(I want it all, don't leave right now.  
I'll give you everything.)  
_

I needed him. But I would never admit it. Never.

_Maybe it's just me.  
Couldn't you believe that everything I said and did  
wasn't just deceiving?  
And the tear in your eye,  
and your calm, hard face makes me wish  
that I was never brought into this place.  
Maybe it's just me _

I ended the song feeling relieved, but I was now sobbing. I heard a key unlock the cell door, and someone came in, before I could smell the after shave.

I was wrapped in a warm embrace, his scent drowning me. His arms surrounding me. Dimitri.

"Wha-what are you doing here?" I asked between sobs.

He sat me on his lap, and I curled into him, holding on for my dear life.

"I'm so sorry, Roza. So sorry. I love you. Please don't cry." He repeated over, and over again ignoring my question.

I held on tighter. "Dimitri what are you doing here?" I said again, with more force in my voice.

A tear slipped from his eye.

"I'm filling in for someone down here, everyone else was busy. Roza, why didn't you let any of us in? Do you know how worried I was for you?" I just stared at him.

"You don't love me." I looked down, my voice was vulnerable. Childish.

"Of course I love you, Roza, I just . . . you shouldn't care for me. I did terrible things." He kissed my hair softly.

I turned to him. "I let you live." I replied."I did worse. I saved your life, when Eddie tried to kill you. Twice, you escaped death. Both by my hand. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you. Not the other way around."

His eyes were cold, I looked away. Hiding my tears.

"Roza . . . I'm a monster. . . you shouldn't-" He started, but I cut him off.

"Do you love me?" I asked.

He looked at me with such a broken look that I had to look away.

"Always, Roza. I will always love you."

I turned, and kissed him with as much passion as I could muster. "That's all I needed to know."

* * *

**Okay, so i hpe that was good. Any-who, I'm going to see Eclipse tomorrow! How many of you are excited? Peter Facinelli, and more hot guys. Who wouldn't wanna watch?**

Review it makes writing to you all worth while!


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